Give me only your love and grace. That is enough for me. Saint Ignatius of Loyola, Suscipe Resolution is void. The more I look inward, the more each motive, each spirit I discern becomes a snarl, a defiant reminder that my best attempts are, at best, no good. Though I ask my conscience to justifyContinue reading “My Examen”
Category Archives: Devotional
The moment
when I realise not that I must always be Somewhere – fording some Jordan, scaling some Hebron, engaged in daily grandiose deeds – but that here, now, at the interstice of wilful self and the ever-grinding call to nothing grand but a pile of dishes, a child needing a hug, a moment of playing atContinue reading “The moment”
Nourish the Soil
Then he told this parable: “A man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard; and he came looking for fruit on it and found none…(Luke 13:6) If year after year I too am fruitless, it is not for want of grace, for want of a vine dresser to plead my plaintive case. No, fruitlessnessContinue reading “Nourish the Soil”
Companions for the journey: Reaching for Mercy
This morning, because the start of daylight saving tricked my son into sleeping in, I had time to read. So I opened up the new poetry anthology from Proost Poets, Reaching for Mercy, a collection that I contributed to. I must admit that, the first time I looked at it, when I had just received a copy,Continue reading “Companions for the journey: Reaching for Mercy”
Isaiah and the Seraph
I shame at mine unworthiness, yet fain would be at one with Thee: Thou art a joy in heaviness, a succour in necessity. (Sir William Leighton, 1614) Shame and joy move in polyphonic sway: the vision delights, augments, and yet diminishes the confidence. How can I, with unclean lips, hymn praises without minor chords? MustContinue reading “Isaiah and the Seraph”
Learning Father (II): For Eli
…it was I who taught Ephraim to walk… (Hosea 11:3) In truth, I teach this child very little. So much is sheer instinct, determination, what HR would call “get up and go”. But there’s little of HR, more of the deep-sea diver or the alchemist at his art, to how this small enthusiast takes toContinue reading “Learning Father (II): For Eli”
Damascus 2: Pentecost
I missed the flames that day, was at my books, learning the whys and wherefores of Law, determined that every subscript iota would not be neglected when I stood before God. The Spirit blows wherever it wills. Mine was the letter, not the wind. When, years later, I clutched letters in hand, I held everyContinue reading “Damascus 2: Pentecost”
Watching Grass Grow
I for one enjoy it: the slow, steady bursting from soil, those optimistic points of green poking sunward, the outward spread of tiny tufts, the promise of patience rewarded. And so daily I take my little son outside to see the garden, to “check on the grass”. All moments are wonders to him, yet IContinue reading “Watching Grass Grow”
Damascus 1
Something ends here: paused mid-threat, flung groundward, the man called Saul can breathe no more murder while the horse kicks up its hooves and he points his arms half-desperate at heaven. Something begins here yet it looks altogether like dying: the fall, the pervasive dark, the eyes failing to see, and yet the spirit cognisantContinue reading “Damascus 1”
“…and how he was known to them in the breaking of the bread” (Emmaus 3)
How like him to appear this way: a walk alongside the mourners, an attentive ear, a willingness to linger, and then – the climax – seated at table, bread, the beloved symbol, poised in hand, and at its breaking all finally clear. How like him who broke bread with Zaccheus, with Levi, with Judas. HowContinue reading ““…and how he was known to them in the breaking of the bread” (Emmaus 3)”
The Consolations of Writing 